Do you ever talk down to yourself? Maybe, question if you are mom-ing the right way. Or feel like an imposter at work? Don’t, you are awesome. I know that because you are here reading about how to get better. Adjusting and improving your mindset will help to realize just what an amazing job you are doing. A great place to start with adjusting your self-care mindset is to talk yourself as if you were your own best friend.
Talk To Yourself Like Your Own Best Friend
Close your eyes and imagine the face of your best friend. Now, feel all of the love and support that person conjures up. Next, replace your best friend’s face with your own and hold on to those feelings of love and support.
When you catch yourself, trash talking yourself, conjure up those feelings. Would you talk to your best friend like that? The answer is probably not, so why would you talk to yourself like that? Don’t.
Re-frame Your Thoughts To Improve Your Mindset
One negative thought can easily spiral until an infinite amount of self-trash talking. Nip that in the bud by re-framing. When you catch yourself, saying bad things about you, pause. Then ask yourself two questions:
- Why am I thinking this?
- Would I talk to my best friend this way?
The negative thought, most likely comes from a positive place. I know that sounds crazy but take a moment to think about it. When we start questioning if we are a good mom. It’s because we want to be a great mom. When tell ourselves we suck at work, it’s often because we want to excel at work. When we feel mom guilt it’s because we care deeply that we are doing this mom thing right.
After you find where your thought is coming from ask yourself, how would you support and encourage your best friend if she brought you this negative thought. Reframe your thoughts to something constructive and positive.
Address What’s Bothering You
Those negative thoughts may be coming from a feeling of inadequacy. If you are putting yourself down or beating yourself up because you feel like you are not adequate, stop. You are enough. You have infinite capacity and with the right mindset can grow and acquire any skills you need to be the woman you want to be.
If your friend found herself in this place, you would probably encourage her by saying something like:
“ Here’s some advice on how you might be able to do that differently”.
“What resources or skills do you need to help you”?
Do the same thing for yourself to improve your mindset. It’s really important that you treat yourself well. You are the only one who is responsible for taking care of you.
Don’t tell yourself things that you wouldn’t tell a best friend. Don’t speak to yourself in a way that you wouldn’t speak to a stranger on the street. You have to respect yourself. It’s important that you build yourself up. You are really the only one that can. You are awesome and you deserve that.
Knowing that self-care is self-love, talking to yourself in a positive way, is not only taking care of yourself, but it is loving yourself. Actions speak louder than words. Act in a way that shows you love yourself. Act in a way that shows you care for yourself. How you speak to yourself is one of the most important actions to get right. Be kind, positive and encouraging and supportive of yourself when you are talking to yourself. This will help to improve your mindset.
If you’re looking for more self-care ideas, try these tips on reconnecting with yourself.
Don’t forget to sign up for the Rose Gold Mine, my free resource library. You’ll get free printable worksheets, workbooks, and checklists to help with goal setting, time management and self-care for busy moms.