Burnout is real. Mom burnout is the realest. With everything going on in your life it’s very easy to go from the point of feeling stressed, to overwhelmed and ultimately like you just don’t care anymore. If you get to the point where you are just going through the motions something needs to change. In fact if you have any concerns about getting to that point, something needs to change. You deserve more in life than to just be checking boxes. You deserve a life filled with joy and you can have one. When working with moms I’ve found there are 5 main causes for burn out. Once you know which one is driving your burn out you’ll be better equipped to address it and get back to being yourself.
Get the “Way To Beat Burnout” worksheet below to help you create your action plan.
Boredom leads to burn out. If day in and day out you’re doing the same thing over and over again it’s easy to burnout. Take a look at your schedule and your day-to-day tasks. Is there any variation? Do you find any excitement or exciting activities in the day? Do the activities in your day challenge your brain? Do your daily tasks force you to think? If the answer to these questions is no then boredom maybe leading you to burnout.
You Don’t Love Where You Spend Your Time
Spending all of your time and energy on things you don’t love can cause you to be burned out. Take a look at what you do each day. Do you love doing any of those tasks? It’s important that you spend your time doing things that you enjoy doing. Be honest with yourself and answer how much of each day you spend doing something you love? There are going to be obligations in your day. We all have things we simply must do whether we love doing them or not. Having said that, if your entire day is just obligations and things that you don’t enjoy doing it is very easy to become burnt out.
It’s OK if those obligations, things like cooking dinner, cleaning the house, taking the kids to activities are things you don’t love. You don’t have to love everything that you do. But you do need to do something you love every day.
Overwhelm can lead to burnout. Do you have too much going on? Is your day packed from sunup to sundown with no time to rest? Do you find yourself doing a lot of things for other people? Do you find yourself without a moment to breathe? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then overwhelm may be your burn out. If that’s the case, you’ll need to start to say no. It’s not easy to say no but it is necessary.
You’re Under Appreciated
Let’s face it mama, you do a lot for other people. From your job to your husband to your kids to the neighbors, your friends, your family and your community, you are helping nonstop. Are people recognizing you for this? Do you feel appreciated for all that you do? You should be appreciated for what you do, but it is easy for people to take it for granted. If that’s the case feeling underappreciated can lead to burn out. If you do not feel appreciated for everything that you’re doing there are two things that you can work on. The first is to recognize yourself for everything that you do. Take some time to pat yourself on the back and reward yourself for all that you do. Your children are alive and fed, you’re holding down a job, and your house is not burnt to the ground. Those are all things worthy of commendation. Make sure that you take time to recognize yourself. The second thing that you can do is to ask for recognition. You don’t have to be subtle about this. Make it clear that you have a lot going on and you’re choosing to help others when you help them. Allow them to then recognize and appreciate what it is that you are doing on their behalf and for them.
You’re Environment Sucks
Being in a gross place can also lead to burn out. When I talk about your environment I’m talking about the physical space that you inhabit as well as the culture that influences it. Take a look around your home, your workplace, your office and your car. What does it look like? Is it a chaotic mess? Are there things everywhere? Is it full of clutter? These things in your physical space can lead to burn out.
If your physical environment is playing a part in causing burnout, update your environment. Tidy up. Get an oil diffuser. Get a painting or a picture that relaxes you and put it up. Change the physical environment that you’re in so that it is more calming and supportive of the life you want to live.
The culture around you also matters. At your job, are people mean to each other? Are people snide? Do people go behind each other’s backs? Is there a lot of negative politics? All of this can lead to burn out. In your home how do you treat each other? Are you kind and patient? Do you have discussions rather than yelling?
If the culture that you’re in is causing an issue then do what you can to change that culture. If it’s your home culture have a chat with your family about how you can all be kinder to each other. Discuss how you can yell less and how you can pay attention and love on each other more. If it’s your work culture that can be more tricky to change. It may be time to start looking for a new job if that culture itself is what’s bringing you down.
Burnout is real. Burnout is especially real for moms. We have so much going on in our lives from kids, to work, to marriage, to maintaining a household, that it is very easy to be pushed past the point of stress and into the realm of burn out. Looking at the five causes for burnout above which one seems to be pushing you closer to the edge? Take some time now to make a decision on how you will combat your burnout triggers? Will you start to say no? Will you ask people to recognize you? Will you begin to pat yourself on the back? Will you change your environment? Will you make time each day to do something that you love? Will you ensure that everyday you are working on something challenging?
Make a plan to ensure you either don’t have to deal with burn out or that you can get out of it. Of course you can always contact a therapist or mental health provider. That is a great way to go when you recognize that you are heading towards or already in burnout.
Get the worksheet below to help you create your action plan.
If you are looking for more ways moms can have better days, check out this self-care article on how moms can have better morning.
Don’t forget to sign up for the Rose Gold Mine, my free resource library. You’ll get free printable worksheets, workbooks, and checklists to help with goal setting, time management and self-care for busy moms.
Learn to ask for support and free your time without letting go of our responsibilities at How To Get Unstuck.