Have you ever talked yourself out of something good?
Have you ever had the chance to take an amazing vacation with your friends but kept telling yourself why you weren’t ready and why now wasn’t the right time to do it?
Have you ever passed on the opportunity to do something you wanted, something that would advance your career or make your life happier, because you thought you weren’t ready?
I’ve gone through this too. I’ve talked myself out of opportunities. I was my first line of rejection.
I kept telling myself, “I’m not ready for the next step.”
I would just talk myself out of all these things that I wanted. It manifested most of my career and had me stalled and stuck.
I realized I needed to stop talking myself out of things and start talking myself INTO things.
You can change your whole life by the stories you tell yourself.
So let’s talk about how to turn this self-talk around.
Say goodbye to the days when you tell yourself that you can’t, shouldn’t, or are not yet ready. Instead, replace that with “I can,” “Here’s how…” and “Here’s what I need to do…”
That change in mindset has made all the difference in advancing my career, having more joy in my relationships, and being better at home and in my community.
We have to make that conscious decision though to change the narrative.
Because if you don’t explicitly draw the line and embrace that shift…
You’re going to have the opportunity to take on that project that could change your life.
You’re going to have the opportunity to go on a vacation that can completely reset who you are.
You’re going to have the opportunity to meet people and develop relationships with them that could amplify your ability to add value to the world.
… and you’ll miss them.
Because you would have talked yourself out of it.
Don’t be your own first line of rejection.
Stop talking yourself out of stuff and start talking yourself into stuff.
Here’s how I changed my self-talk.
If I caught myself saying, “I’m not ready” or “I can’t” and making excuses for why I couldn’t do things, that triggered me to push that shift button. I started telling myself, “Here’s what I need to do.”
When a really exciting project comes up and I’m excited to work on it, here’s what I need to do to make sure that I’m ready.
I want to take this dream vacation. Instead of telling myself I can’t afford it, here’s what I can do to save more to make it happen.
That’s what I want to challenge you to do.
When was the last time that you talked yourself out of something? When was the last time that you fell into that self-talk doom loop? The self-talk doom loop is when you start telling yourself “I can’t” and “I’m not ready,” and then your actions match that, so you never get the thing that you want.
Jump out of the self-talk doom loop and go into a self-love and advancement loop – one that spins you around and launches you a thousand feet ahead in life.
That loop is where you start telling yourself, here’s what I can do to be ready. Here’s what I can do to make these things that I want happen.
When you do that, you will find more joy and more sense of fulfillment. Your career will advance and your relationships will get better too.
Embracing a new mindset isn’t just progress; it’s the key to personal growth, guiding careers, happiness, and deeper relationships.
Take action
I want you to take a moment and think about when you turned yourself down and replay that conversation in your head. Remember and rewrite the script.
What could you have said to encourage yourself?
How can you start talking yourself into these things that you love and want to do?
You can change your entire life just by the words that you use when you talk to yourself. You can change your whole life by the stories you tell yourself.
“I am smart. I am capable. Here’s what I need to do to get this thing that I want.”
If you’d like this conversation, please check out my podcast, The Savvy Working Mom, where we talk all about how you can find joy, advance your career, and really love your life as a working mother.
Don’t forget to sign up for my free resource library. You’ll get free printable worksheets, workbooks, and checklists to help with goal setting, time management, and self-care for busy moms.
Let’s makeover your routine at How To Get Unstuck.
