Life throws us curveballs, especially for working moms, wearing many hats and juggling many responsibilities.
Things can come out from nowhere. There could be an emergency at work, at home, or with a friend. There could be a sudden need that only you can help with. Life could get out of control sometimes. When it does, it can wreck your plans and the goals that you have set.
You could wake up completely ready to have a great day at work. You wake up, get the kids dressed, start on your project, and then out of nowhere, a problem occurs that ruins your plans for the day.
Life happens. When it does, it can throw you off your game, but it doesn’t have to.
How do you stay on top? One of the most important ways to keep on your A-game, to feel good every single day about what you’re doing and who you are, is to choose your words wisely.
Choose the words you use to talk to yourself very carefully because they have power over your actions. How you react to those unplanned, unintended events makes a huge difference in whether you still achieve or don’t achieve your plans.
Think about the words you use as you go through the day and whenever you face setbacks.
Survivor vs. Victim
If you go through something painful, you can either tell yourself that you’re a victim or a survivor. There’s so much power in the word “survivor,” and there’s also power in the word “victim.”
Which one you call yourself will determine how you show up in the world, what actions you take, and how you live your life. Try focusing on being a survivor, because you are stronger now, and you made it through.
“I have to” vs. “I choose to”
“I have to” takes away all of your power. This is something that must be done, that’s put upon you. “I choose to” gives you control because you’re making the choice.
I wake up early a lot. I could say, “I have to wake up at 5 AM to get things done. I have to wake up at 5 AM just to have a moment of silence.” Or I could say, “I CHOOSE TO wake up at 5 AM so that I can have a moment of silence. I CHOOSE TO wake up at 5 AM, so I can ease into my day. I CHOOSE TO wake up at 5 AM so I can work on The Savvy Working Mom.”
If I HAVE to do it, I do it begrudgingly. I choose to do these things and I feel good because I’m owning that choice in my power.
On the flip side, there’s “I can’t” vs. “I choose not to.”
“I can’t” takes away your power. It can leave you feeling like you aren’t worthy, like you don’t have the ability. But often, when we say we can’t, it actually means we choose not to.
“I can’t help with this thing that you had asked me to do.” You can refuse more responsibilities, but don’t tell yourself you can’t do anything. No, you’re CHOOSING not to. You’re choosing to do something better with your time.
I choose not to. I choose not to go to this event. I choose not to do that task for someone. Because in that choice, I’m freeing myself up to work on things that matter to me.
Happening to you vs. Happening for you
Things happen to us all the time, but they also happen for us.
Which one you tell yourself affects how you’ll get through the situation. Saying something happened to you takes away the chance to have any positivity in it. Instead, if you say it happened for me, it leaves a door open to help you understand that maybe a lesson that could be learned or a path with opportunities could open.
There is power in saying this thing happened FOR me, rather than saying it happened to me.
Lastly, “I suck at this” vs. “I’m still learning.”
I struggled with this as well. I say to myself sometimes, I suck at this. But the truth is, I’m still learning, or even better, I’m mastering this thing.
Don’t say that you’re bad at something or you don’t know how. The truth is you’re still learning or you’re mastering it. This mindset opens you up for growth instead of being stuck where you are.
These are a few different ways to think about how you can take negative words and replace them with words that will help you to push through the day joyfully and purposefully.
When life throws you curveballs, even when life hands you a big old bucket of lemons, even when your kids don’t sleep through the night and there’s emergencies all over, using positive words, as you talk to yourself about the situation you’re in, will make that situation feel better.
Choosing powerful words will lead you to take better, stronger, more productive outcomes so that you can live a life with joy and purpose.
Now, I would love for you to take a moment. Take action and think about one of those negative things that you might say to yourself, and what positive phrase could you use to replace it?
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